Things are settling now, but not in the way I expected. Living in Echo Park, especially with Machiko, is amazing however. Our mornings are full of hiking, smoothies, eggs in a cast iron skillet, psychoanalysis, and foam rolling. Evenings are Farmer's Market inspired spreads with fresh flowers, Evan's sous chef-ness, puppy cuddles and synth pop.
I am happy with that. And I am happy with my job. And I am happy that I have the time and flexibility to focus on being happy, healthy and mindful and being able to focus on side projects.
A lot of this introspection has been brought to the forefront by Starting Bloc, an amazing institute I attended earlier this month. I learned that I oscillate, almost maniacally between being so available to people that I burn out and swing toward isolation and introversion. I'm learning to find more balance and identify which relationships I need to invest in and prioritize.
But before I get too maudlin, I have to say this month has been and will continue to be full of amazing, memorable and life-giving experiences.
Two weeks ago, my mom, bro and I met our family in Vegas for a long over-due reunion. Jas and my cousin Jag are carbon copies of each other - chill, laid-back, sensitive men, while Neen, Karen and I are bombastic nurturers with a penchant for margaritas. And seeing my mom with her sister was beyond amazing and warming and wonderful and inspiring and lovely - as was seeing them at a club with us and watching people twerk. [Also we loved Hakkasan, Julian Serrano, and Mon Ami Gabi - thanks friends for the recs].
Machiko, Cassi and I also hosted our first D12 at the new apartment, which went well with homemade bruschetta and hummus; pasta salad with fireroasted peppers, kalamata olives, tomatoes and cucumbers; kale salad with cara cara oranges, feta and avocado; and rosemary, garlic, lemon chicken.
After, I was reunited with my O-Staff loves, some of whom I hadn't seen in four or five years. They are still my family and put up with so much from me, including abbrevs, dog obsessions, coaching me through my first years of college and being my support system through my toughest times. I am overwhelmed by the gratitude and love I felt for them on Saturday and I hope I see them all sooner rather than later.I also got to see Larissa and her adorable Princess P. Larissa was my sounding board for a lot this weekend and helped me really focus in on my next steps for this year. It also helps that she is the funniest and warmest person like ever.
Other things to look forward to:
Birthday celebrations!
Sara B is visiting me this weekend!
Mammoth!
More Vegas!
Sylvan Esso and Jose Gonzalez shows!
(And cuddling Sophie at the end of each and every day)
Also some inspiring words that have been helping me focus on bettering myself, especially re: interpersonal relationships:
- I cannot give you power, I can only give you the space to assumer your own power.
- "Doing what one wants to do because one wants to do it is hard for a lot of people, but I think it’s particularly hard for women. We are, after all, the gender onto which a giant Here To Serve button has been eternally pinned. We’re expected to nurture and give by the very virtue of our femaleness, to consider other people’s feelings and needs before our own. I’m not opposed to those traits. The people I most admire are in fact nurturing and generous and considerate. Certainly, an ethical and evolved life entails a whole lot of doing things one doesn’t particularly want to do and not doing things one very much does, regardless of gender.
But an ethical and evolved life also entails telling the truth about oneself and living out that truth." Cheryl Strayd, Dear Sugar columnist
- "Courage is the price that life extracts for granting peace." Amelia Earhart
- Choose joy.
